Overwhelmed by the love and support I received as I walked across the stage on my convocation day – the stage that I’ve watched people walk on for the last three years as I volunteered as a usher for the past convocations. Finally, it was my turn. Sitting at my seat, watching row by row of graduates get up in a single file line, each student’s name called out to acknowledge all their hard work, countless nights of paper writing and last minute assignments, searching over and over again how to cite research articles, endlessly writing waiting for Microsoft Word to hit the exact number of words assigned, trying to stay awake in those super early 8am classes, all those other work commitments and extracurricular activities and everything else in between – it was finally time to recognize it all with extreme joy and happiness and show the world that we’ve did it and our time on campus is concluding, ready to leave a legacy behind and walk into a new chapter in life.
However, I am rather pouring with excitement to be back on campus in the fall. To know that my time and presence at the university is not over yet, I am filled of joy to come back with a firm foundation that I am here to make a difference, to connect with other people around me and continue to be that listening ear I’ve been blessed with. To hear all their stories and encourage one another, to plant a seed and watch it grow, to pour my heart out to those that need to hear what their heart desires and ultimately share my story and God’s love for all to hear, no matter how far we’ve ran away from Him, no matter how much wrong we’ve done.
We are all worthy of His love because we matter to Him. His love for each one of us is so unexplainable, yet it’s really the only thing that we need in this world that is defined by our performance, our schedules, the numbers and all the wisdom and knowledge we hold. He is our ultimate healer, redeemer and source of strength and pure joy and love.
For the majority of my life, my motto was always “love others before myself, so that everyone around me is happy with a bright smile on their face”. And without even being aware of it, a lot of my kindness and love for others was all about the actions, the “dos” or in other words, the performance aspect that I’ve been constantly fighting against. To love was the sacrifice I took to make that one person happy and to go out of my ways to help however I can. Giving was what I thought was the best way to do for someone – whether it was my time, a small encouragement or even a small gift, but when it came down to receiving love, my heart immediately built a wall. I never thought I needed to receive the same love I gave others until one day it hit me.
How can I give more love if I can’t receive it?
In Mark 12:31, it says “love your neighbour as yourself” – in other words, love yourself the way you would love your neighbour and not ‘before’ yourself. How mind blowing is it that loving yourself and caring for yourself is just as important as loving others. Without working on ourselves, there is something missing inside us – potentially the inability to fully love others as ourselves. By recognizing that we are children of God and that our Heavenly Father loves us so much more than we can comprehend, that is when we fully love and nothing that once defined us matters anymore. We no longer care about what others think of us and what once held us down no longer matters because there are far more bigger and greater things out there than one struggle we faced and wrapped around us for many years.
In the midst of this adventure, there will always be experiences that makes us question why things happened the way they did. There will often be answers we can’t seem to find, keeping our minds running active every single moment we are kept alone and unproductive, but are those answers really worth finding? When we really step out of our own perspectives, we quickly realize that those don’t matter when there is so much potential awaiting us each day. Two months from now or even two years from now, those answers will definitely not matter but rather bring out those ah-ha moments of why everything came to be and really understand why those experiences happened the way it did.
So in the meantime, why don’t we take those opportunities awaiting us, walk through those opened doors and keep that fire going inside you – the passion that sparks a fire each time we do what we love to do?
And as I continue this adventure, the search for myself is never going to end. There will be moments where I will come back to this thinking process but the fight is worth it all when I know I’m being taken good care of. After six years of weaving around, taking some detours and getting lost and confused of what’s to come, I’m finally where I need to be and back on track, revealing my passions and all that I can do with it! I’m so excited to see what is out there for me to be a blessing and the continuation of my passions come to life. That is what I live for – for the glory of God and to share His love for every single person I encounter!
Let us not be defined by what we do,
but let God’s grace overflow in us.
For His love for each and every one of us
is far more than we’ll ever comprehend.
He is One I walk in my mission with
e v e r y
s i n g l e
d a y .
B L E S S I N G S,